12 Emoji That You’re Probably Using Wrong

New York‘s cover story this week proclaims, “Smile, You’re Speaking Emoji.” But are you? Do you understand the difference between the tongue-out emoji and the winking tongue-out emoji? Today’s children communicate almost exclusively in these little smileys, and soon the weak emoji-illiterates in our society will be left behind.

As Adam Sternbergh writes in New York, the “elasticity of meaning is a large part of the appeal and, perhaps, the genius of emoji. … These seemingly infantile cartoons are instantly recognizable, which makes them understandable even across linguistic barriers. Yet the implications of emoji—their secret meanings—are constantly in flux.”

Good news: We know the secret meanings of emoji. Before you find that you’re unable to express your feelings to anyone, familiarize yourself with the true meanings of the 12 most confusing emoji faces.

The Grimace

Emojipedia classifies this one as a “grinning face with smiling eyes,” but it’s a grimace. There are shades of anxiety in there as well, as in I get my LSAT scores in 2 days :grimace emoji:

The Whistle

While this is technically a “kissing face,” it is never used that way. The whistle emoji is appropriate to use when someone asks you if you ate the last of the Skittles, and you have no good answer because you did. Not me :whistle emoji:

Flirty Blush vs. Pillsbury Dough Boy

Two blushing emojis, two different meanings. First is the flirty blush emoji, which is appropriate to use when you are flirting. (?? I’ve heard.)

Next is the creepier cousin of the flirty blush, the Pillsbury dough boy emoji. It tickles! :Pillsbury dough boy emoji: Don’t use this.

The Shrug

This is the closest emoji to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, but it’s imbued with slightly more sadness. It’s Jim Halpert looking at the camera. Your friend: Did you hear The Newsroom got a third season? You: :shrug emoji:

Neutral

This signifies an inability to relate to the subject at hand.

The Overexertion

Technically, this emoji is classified as “triumph,” which couldn’t be more wrong. You could reasonably interpret it to mean “mad” or “steaming mad,” but its true meaning is “I’m struggling on a treadmill rn.”

Panting vs. Silly Wink vs. Poison Control

The three tongue-out emojis are easy to get confused. First is the simple tongue-out face, which signifies panting. It comes off as creepy in most situations and should be avoided.

Next is the silly wink emoji, which means “hey I just made a slightly off-color joke, don’t be mad” or “I’m on poppers!”

Last is the poison control emoji, which signifies extreme distaste with the subject at hand. Your friend: Fucking DEREK booty called me last night. You: :poison control emoji:

The Sweaty Smile

This is not Singin’ In the Rain. This is the nervous, sweaty smile—the *tugs collar* emoji. Off to dinner with my girlfriend’s parents! :sweaty smile emoji:

The Man Baby

The official classification of this emoji is “tired face,” but it actually signifies someone throwing a tantrum.

Get it now? If you’re still confused, don’t worry, you’ll probably die soon.

Art by Sam Woolley

Shell’s plans mean disaster for the Arctic, and our government might let it happen.

Tell the Obama administration that the environmental impacts of Arctic drilling are too big to ignore.

As Florida’s Attorney General, Pam Bondi has a duty to uphold our laws and justice system with integrity.

But she could not care less. She’s been selling out Florida’s justice system to Washington lobbyists, socializing with attorneys who have corporate clients under state investigation.

They shower her with free trips, and in return, she’s been dropping cases and looking the other way. This behavior is wildly inappropriate – and a clear violation of Florida law.

Add your name: Call on Rick Scott to set up an independent investigation into Bondi’s blatant disregard for the law!

We cannot continue to let Bondi rob Floridians of the justice they deserve.

Our state needs an AG who’ll fight back against the bad guys, not someone who’ll take their gifts and hobnob with them at island resorts.

It is our Governor’s obligation to do the right thing by holding Bondi accountable for her actions. Will you stand with us?

Tell Rick Scott to set up an independent investigation into Bondi’s behavior! Add your name here.

Thanks,

Florida Democrats

By CAP Action War Room

Virgil Pack is a father of two from Richmond, Virginia, who works 3 low wage jobs for 65 hours a week with no benefits. He has completed two years of college and used to run his own business, he says, “but in this economy this is all the work I can find. Every month is a struggle to make ends meet.”

Virgil shared his story during the release event at CAP Action for this year’s Half in Ten annual report, Building Local Momentum for National Change: The 2014 Half in Ten Poverty and Inequality Indicators Report. The report examines 21 different indicators of economic security and opportunity to track the goal of cutting poverty in half in 10 years. In states and municipalities across the country, movements to raise the minimum wage, provide paid sick leave and universal pre-K, and other progressive policies have gained steam. But there is much more that needs to be done for people out there like Virgil and his family. Here are some of the key findings:

There was some progress on the poverty rate this year but chronic economic insecurity persists. The national poverty rate fell from 15 percent in 2012 to 14.5 percent in 2013—the first statistically significant decrease since 2006—but many low-income Americans continue to struggle to make ends meet in today’s economy. Income inequality is at the same level as the 1920’s, service sector wages have been flat for over a decade, and the minimum wage hasn’t kept track with the rising costs of living.

Progress and momentum at the local and state level shows that public will is building in the right direction. In the recent election, voters in blue states and red states strongly supported progressive policies that would boost the economic security of American families. In fact, in five out of five states where a minimum wage increase was on the ballot, voters supported the increase by an average of 26 points.

Especially as the groundwork for the 2016 begins, we must leverage local and state progressive movements and successes to build a truly national anti-poverty movement. With income inequality at levels not seen since the 1920s, a shrinking middle class, stagnant wages, and too little progress on poverty, we must set the stage to make poverty reduction a serious and accountable priority.

BOTTOM LINE: While there are some bright spots in this year’s poverty data, it’s a strong reminder that our economy still isn’t working for low-income Americans. Promising developments at the local level are a step in the right direction, and it’s time for policymakers at the federal level to make the right choices to support families and cut poverty. Hardworking men and women like Virgil shouldn’t have to work full time or overtime and still worry about providing basic necessities for their families.

See Also: VIDEO: Building Local Momentum for National Change: The 2014 Half in Ten Poverty and Inequality Indicators Report

by OnPolitics